Hands and shoulders, knees and toes

I realized after last nights blog that I haven’t been blogging lately. It’s not because there’s nothing to write about – but because my hands hurt.

Actually my hands, shoulders, knees and toes all ache. I have stiffness in my fingers and toes. I still wake up with “claw hands” in the morning. Takes me a while before I can use them properly.

My hands are weak. I can’t open jars, packages or carry anything heavy anymore. My feet are really creaky when I first wake up and when I go for my 3am pee I have to walk really carefully because they just don’t work properly until they get warmed up.

My shoulders and knees ache and if I do anything too athletic that puts pressure on my joints – I have a hard time the next day with aches and pains. Even sitting for a long time is difficult. For example – if I sit and watch a movie – depending on the day it can be uncomfortable to sit and I’m very stiff when I get up and start walking.

Ihand-palm-5-empty2t’s probably some kind of arthritis that was flared up from either chemo or from the physical trauma I went through when I was taking Tamoxifen.

The only thing that makes me feel better is swimming. Getting in the pool makes all the aches and pains go away. That’s why I love aquafit and how I stay motivated to go every morning. Not only is it great exercise – but also gives me relief from pain.

I’ve also been taking Purica Recovery and it helps A LOT! It’s nice to find a vegan friendly product like this that works.  :)

The pain isn’t so bad that I can’t function – it’s about a 4 on the pain-scale but sometimes it’s a 6. I have a meeting with a rheumatologist at the beginning of June and I hope she has some good information for me. I’m hoping that there is something I can do to make it go away forever. Or that this is a temporary symptom from all the treatment I did. It’s a LOT better then it was – but it’s still keeping me from doing what I want to do. :(

I taught the warm-up for Aquafit the other day and doing exercises on the side of the pool really hurt my knees and feet the next day. So much so that I told them I can’t do anything high-impact on the side of the pool – so I am now learning how to teach the GentleFit which is a slower more.

I can’t play my ukulele right now either. :( I’m ok playing a few songs but I can’t practice for more then 15 minutes or my hands ache so badly the next day. It’s a total bummer.

And that’s the reason I haven’t been blogging. Sitting at the desk or typing for a long time is hard on my body. Ugh. I haven’t even told you about my trip to Hawaii or my trip to NY/Toronto. Maybe tomorrow.  😉

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Surgery …

Went and saw my surgeon to talk about doing “deconstruction”. I like him a lot… I feel really lucky to have a surgeon who gets what I want to do. He was surprised that I wanted to remove my left breast and just be flat – but he understands my desire to be symmetrical and also that I don’t want to do reconstruction.

Because this is a non-urgent issue like last time (look ma no cancer) :) I am now on a waiting list to have the surgery. I’m number 98 on the list so that means I will probably get a surgery date in the fall of this year – but I’m also on a cancellation list – so if someone cancels or backs-out of surgery I can nab their spot and get in sooner.

The good news is that because he’s not messing with my lymph-nodes – it will just be day surgery. Surgery in the morning and home and on the sofa that afternoon.

I came home from the doctors office and I had a butterfly in my stomach. I am excited.

It might seem weird to some of you that I am excited to remove my other breast – but I am looking forward to not having to wear an uncomfortable prosthetic anymore and to no longer be lopsided. I find it very uncomfortable.

My friends keep calling it a ballerina body or a flapper body – but truth is I am still carrying around my chemo/meopause weight (can’t seem to shake it). So I will more then likely look like I have a Buddha body. :)

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The surgeon asked me if I was worried about not looking feminine and I told him I was not worried about it at all… I think my definition of feminine is different then most. When I was in high school and started becoming interested using clothing as a way to express myself I always modeled myself after androgynous icons.

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Annie Lennox was a big influence on me. She rocked short hair and mens suits and was incredibly powerful and beautiful all at the same time.

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Boy George, David Bowie, Jane Wiedlin, Patti Smith. Even Frank N. Furter from Rocky Horror was someone I aspired to capture the essence of in my outfits. :)

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I recently found this photo of me from highschool … Gosh I’m adorable.  :)

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My fav unisexual artist is Prince. I never wanted to dress like him – but I did want him to do my make-up for me.  :)

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I am not looking forward to the surgery (or the downtime away from the pool for recovery) but I am looking forward to the freedom of symmetry. I’m also excited to figure out what clothing will work for my new flat chested body. I realized after I saw the surgeon that I don’t really play “dress up” anymore. This prosthetic boob really bums me out and so does being a uni-boober.

I think a shopping spree is in order once I’m all healed up. Yippee!

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Mothers Day

Happy Mothers Day. I lost my mum to cancer when I was 10 and there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about her. 

 In a few short years she made a huge impact on me – she taught me about feminism, how to write a story, how to braid my hair. 

Taught me that cooking from scratch with fresh ingredients is the only way to make a meal and that food that comes in a box isn’t real food. 

Most importantly she taught me that animals shouldn’t suffer and die so that we have something to eat. That every animal has a mother who loves them. 

So on this day – Mothers Day – please go vegan. 

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Lurking …

IMG_9306I’m going through my iPhoto. I’m creeping closer and closer to the date I found my Cancer.

It’s weird to know what’s coming… It’s like a horror movie. She has no idea there’s a killer lurking.

 

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Good Life Juice Cleanse – Day 7

On my last day I started slowly and gently introducing food back into my diet. Had a plain baked potato and some steamed broccoli with my juice last night. Yum.

goodlifejuiceI woke up at 4am with the WORST headache. I think I didn’t drink enough water during the day … and then I woke up again to have a 5:30am poop. Thanks a lot bowels. Couldn’t you wait until 7:30? :)

I want to thank Good Life Cleanse for this week. We had a few minor hiccups with my order and they were awesome about it. Very attentive. Made sure I was happy.

Their juice is stellar. Tastes amazing. Even if you don’t want to do a full-on cleanse you should try their Cold-Pressed juice. It’s a beautiful way to drink your salad. :)

Don’t forget that if you want to try Good Life Cleanse – use the code: govegangogoodlife for 15% off your order (until April 15th).

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Fergus…

what kind of yoga pose is this??? 😜

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Good Life Cleanse – Give Away!!

FRIENDS!!! Good Life Cleanse​ is doing a Facebook give-away!! A 2-day Juice Cleanse (12 cold pressed juices) plus free delivery! This is not an April Fools joke!! :)

All the info is on my Facebook page. Contest ends on April 7th. They will chose a winner at random.  :)  This is for BC/ALBERTA Canada residents ONLY!!

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Good Life Cleanse: Day 6

Day 6 of my Good Life Juice Cleanse was awesome. I woke up full of energy and was raring to go!! Gerry and I ran errands all day. I can tell that it was a super busy day because I didn’t take any photos during the day … ha ha.

I really thought when I started that there was no way I could finish a 7 day cleanse but here I am! Tomorrow is my last day and I’m a little sad about it!! :(

10881943_411119132400935_1494929698_nAs my cleanse come to a close I’ve been thinking of some tips I could share that would help you if you ever decide to do a juice cleanse.

#1: Water. If you’re feeling hungry – drink a big glass of water. Feeling cranky? Water. Feeling woozy. Water. Feeling tired. Water. Have a headache? Water.

It is VITAL that you drink water during your cleanse to flush out all the toxins that get stirred up during the cleanse. Yes you’ll pee a lot but it’s not that big a deal.

#2. Flavoured Toothpicks. My mouth tasted like garbage for the first 3-4 days and brushing/scraping your tongue can help – you can’t do that when you’re at the bank. So I found organic mint-flavoured toothpicks at the healthfood store and anytime my mouth tasted horrible I’d pop one in. It was better then a stick of gum and plus you get to look like a cool tough-guy. Ayyyyy sit on it! (Fonzi reference).

#3. Chillax. Take this time to listen to your body. If it’s tired? Rest. If you’re stressed out or trying to fit too many things into your day – your cleanse will backfire. This is your week to nourish your body and be chill.

#4. Exercise. I had no problem doing Aquafit or going for dog walks – I just took it easy and listened to my body. For example when I took the dogs to the beach I usually walk and a brisk pace for 45 minutes. During the cleanse I walked at a leisurely pace and when I started to feel tired – instead of pushing myself – I sauntered back to the car. :)

#5. Do you. If you need to add a little something to your cleanse to make it through the week – do it. I added eating an avocado between 1-3pm and it made everything so much easier. My guts needed a little something extra to help them through the day. I don’t feel badly because I made a smart choice.

Don’t forget that if you want to try Good Life Cleanse – use the code: govegangogoodlife for 15% off your order (until April 15th).

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Good Day Cleanse – Day 4 & 5

Eeeep! I’ve been so busy I ran out of time to blog.

Day 4 of my Good Life Cleanse went great. I could care less about food … all those cravings are gone and now I am quite satiated by the juice. Except between 1:00-3pm. For some reason during that time of day my guts make a symphony of sounds. So I have added an avocado with my 1pm juice and everything is perfect now.

Also – Dwight came to visit for a sleepover. We did a lot of this:

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And this: 11095596_855106977878928_1044424381_n

And this: 10296793_635733939905003_1942097545_n

And we went to the beach for a nice walk:
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Day 5: I had to get up early and go to school at the Y for my teacher training. It was difficult to leave because of this:

11055704_619829278152407_2039907293_nMy class went great. I told everyone I was doing a Good Life Juice cleanse and that I might have to get up 500x during class to pee but it actually wasn’t that bad.  :) I think I did pretty good on my test. Ugh. Tests make me so anxious!!

Then I came home and did some of this:

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Mixed with a little bit of this: 11085133_357293297791906_685964901_nOnly 2 more days of my cleanse left … I thought I wouldn’t make it all the way through to the end but now I think I’m going to miss it.  :(

Don’t forget that if you want to try Good Life Cleanse – use the code: govegangogoodlife for 15% off your order (until April 15th).

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Good Life Cleanse – Day 3

6:45am: I slept really well again last night but I woke up with anxiety … woke up stressing about the doctors appointment I have with my surgeon next week. We are meeting to talk about my “deconstruction” and having my other breast removed so I can be flat & fabulous instead of lopsided & uncomfortable.

I’m nervous because I really want to be flat. I’m so over having one boob … OVER IT! But I’m also nervous about the surgery. Actually mostly nervous about the recovery time and how long it will take me before I’m back in the pool.  :)

main8:04am: Oh. I guess I fell back to sleep. Thank you Square Breathing.

8:19am: Had my water. Now I’m having my tea. I’m not even thinking about food …

10am: Went to aquafit. Did my class and scaled back a bit. I did get a little woozy when I walked into the changeroom. I walked right into a locker door. Ha ha. I was fine.

11:05am: Met Gerry at TZ and we sat out front of the shop and drank our Good Life juices. The weather today is INCREDIBLE! Super warm fresh smelling spring breezes. The sun is warm on my skin. I love it!!

11:27am: I feel like cocooning today. I always find day 3 the hardest. Day 3 of chemo was always the worst. Day 3 after my surgery was the most uncomfortable. Day 3 of my cleanse. Same. I sat on the couch to say hi to Fergus and I fell asleep about 30 seconds later.

12:19pm: Was woken up by a text from my best bestie Shoshana. As we were gossiping on the phone I walked into the kitchen and almost opened up a bag of Hippie Foods Coconut Chips to nosh on while we chatted. I was going to shove food in my  mouth for no reason. It’s kind of fascinating to be forced to confront your unconscious eating habits. So weird. Moved from the couch to bed. Fell asleep again.

1:11pm: Auntie Bonnie called. Woke me up (it’s my fault. I should have put the phone on silent) but we had a nice long talk. :)

3:30pm: Still laying here.

4:15pm: Still laying around.

4:47: I finally got up and had a shower. Put on my eyebrows and I am now partially dressed. I still don’t have any pants on. I’m not even sure where they are??  :)

My stomach has been burbly all day. My 1pm and 3pm juice seem to cause my gut distress. I wonder if it’s the time of day or the ingredients? I had my 5pm juice early. I am not hungry but I am craving my next juice. Yum. Yummy.

I’ve had a few people ask me why I’m doing a juice cleanse. I love to do a cleanse. Remember when I did the Banana Island Cleanse?? I do them for lots of different reasons – I really enjoy the challenge of it. I’ve always found that the first 3-4 days are the most challenging and then by the 5,6,7th day I feel AMAZING. Full of energy and mental clarity.

It’s like cleaning out the attic of all the junk and cobwebs.

The last 2 years have been full of breast cancer treatment and I went through chemo, radiation and copious amounts of medications. Because of my extreme nausea during treatment I couldn’t eat like I normally do (fresh/vegan) … I ate white bread and white crackers and drank gingerale. Ugh. I feel sick just thinking about it.

I’m back on track now. I’m feeling awesome. I’m physically strong again … so I wanted shake out the cobwebs and clean out the attic.

5:14pm: My new batch of juice arrived for the next 3 days. I snapped at Gerry when I came to pick them up. He said something and I slammed a drawer shut and was SO mad but now I don’t even remember why. I guess I am hangry. I need my 5pm juice.  :)

10518136_1598082583811583_749192578_n8:34pm: My favourite part of the day is snuggling with Fergus and drinking my cashew cream.

10:54pm: Gerry and I stayed up late binge watching House of Cards. Time for bed. So. Tired.

If you’re interested in joining me do a Good Life Cleanse – use the code: govegangogoodlife for 15% off your order (until April 15th).

 

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