Roller Coaster!!

Holy cow … What a crazy roller-coaster the end of 2015 was…

I got a call on Dec 29th from my surgeons receptionist asking me if I wanted to have my deconstruction surgery on Thursday. HUH? WHAT? “This Thursday? New Years Eve?” I gulped.

I had previously asked her to put me on a waiting list if any empty spots showed up because the thought of having to wait til Sept/Oct 2016 was distressing to me. My left breast makes me feel stuck. Like half of me lives in the past and the other half lives in the now. Anyway she said they had some space on New Years Eve if I wanted it and I of course said yes and then went into panic mode. πŸ™‚

I ran to the grocery store and stocked up on food so Gerry wouldn’t have to think about what to make me. I ran around buying medical sponges to wash my body with the day-of surgery. I did all the errands I’ve been putting off … I was ready.

I got a call on Wed. Are you stillΒ  in for surgery on Thursday? YES! She told me she would call me Wed after 6 to give me all the details about what time to arrive to the hospital, etc.

She called at 6. I got bumped. No surgery. Ugh. I guess there was an emergency and I got bumped. It’s ok. I wasn’t upset but I did feel like UGH.Β  πŸ™

Gerry and I went out that night to a Kirtan for New Years and we sang and chanted the night away. It was lots of fun and a wonderfully grounding way to spend our night. We went to sleep and in the middle of the night around 3am Fergus threw up. Then he threw up again. And again.

The next day he wouldn’t eat … wouldn’t drink water… so around 6:30pm we took him to the Central Victoria Vet Hospital. It’s the only place in town that’s open 24 hours and was open during the holiday.

They gave him fluids and medication. The first vet we saw was lovely and thought he was having a bout of pancreatitis again. He wanted to keep him the night… ok … I won’t bore you with all the details but when I went to visit Fergus he had diarrhea, wasn’t eating and was highly stressed.

I took him for a walk. Cleaned up his backside (they handed him to me with his entire back end covered in shit) and I started to panic … I felt like he was getting worse. Not better. I had a feeling I needed to get him out of there.

After a giant mix-up with an overworked vet (who told me she had been working 15 hours straight and was exhausted) he had to spend another night. Ugh. But we came up with a plan to bring him home the next day. We got him home. Got him to eat and the next day we saw my vet and she took him off all the meds the hospital had prescribed. They were over medicating him and with medications that were giving him an upset stomach. πŸ™

She gave him a shot of Cerenia and by the time we got home (15 minutes later) I knew he was ok again. He was bright eyed and asking for food. THANK DOG!!

heidiHe’s on the mend. Doing better every day … He lost 2lbs in the 3 days he was in the hospital. Ugh. That’s a lot for a tiny 13lb dog. But he’s now putting on weight and eating every time I put a bowlful of food down so I am happy with his progress.

My niece was in town visiting and it was so sweet to see them together. They grew up as puppies together.Β  πŸ™‚ They have a special bond.

We couldn’t leave Fergus for more then an hour or two so we spent a lot of time at home watching old VHS’s of Heidi when she was 3 & 4 years old.

It was so weird to watch my 20 year old niece watching videos of herself. It made me feel verrrrry old.Β  πŸ™‚

tumblr_l1cmgzTaru1qakdf3o1_500So the first 11 days of 2016 have been a roller-coaster … and guess what? I got a call this afternoon that they can fit me in for my surgery TOMORROW! Eeek.

I’m scared and excited and sad and then excited again. It’s a roller-coaster! Even though I’m nervous … I’m ready.

In the immortal words of Hedwig: “To walk away, you’ve got to leave something behind…” and I’m ready.

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