Dearly Beloved …

Dearly beloved. We are gathered here today 2 get through this thing called life.

I can’t even explain in words how I feel about Prince passing away. I have barely started to process that we lost David Bowie… and now this? 🙁

I was walking to yoga yesterday and my phone started blowing up.
“Is it true?”
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Oh my god have you heard? Are you ok?”

I stopped in my tracks. I knew. Before I even opened up my browser to check the TMZ website … I knew. Prince had died.

I couldn’t breath. I stood in the middle of Fort Street with my back against the wall of some random building and tried to catch my breath. I could feel the sun burning my face. I could hear the birds chirping and the loudness of the cars as they whizzed past me. I was so aware of my feet on the ground and yet I felt like I was floating.

I couldn’t move my body. I didn’t know what to do with myself … instead of looking for more information I put my phone into Airplane mode and went to my yoga class. This particular yoga class is the best part of my week and I needed it or I was going to lose it.

I walked through the Y to my class feeling stunned. I took off my purple running shoes. Lay down my purple yoga mat and filled up my purple water bottle. Yes… I’m that girl. Every-time I get a chance to buy something in purple – I do.

I took a sip of water and dribbled a little on my tank top. I looked down at my shirt and realized I was wearing my favourite Prince shirt. I felt my face get hot and prickly but before I could unravel it was time to start class.

We started class with chanting the Invocation to Patanjali and after that I don’t remember much else of the class. I moved my body and listened to my teacher Ty’s instructions but I didn’t want to think … I just wanted to do.

After class was over I went and saw Gerry at the shop. He gave me a hug and asked me how I was. I felt numb. I turned my phone back on and it started blowing up again. Texts, emails, fb, twitter, Instagram. It was all too much. I turned it off.

I started to drive home and turned on the radio. Purple Rain was playing … I turned it off. It was all too much. I turned it off.

IMG_5405I had a very quiet day. I talked to my best-bestie Shoshana and we talked about Prince. We used to listen to her Purple Rain cassette tape over and over again. I have such vivid memories of being in her room and FEELING every single note.

He meant so much to both of us and we were SO lucky to get to see him play live in Toronto in 2011. It was an incredible experience. It wasn’t a show. It was an experience. It was otherworldly. I left that show a changed person.

One of the things I took away from that show was the joy of being in the moment. He was there with us and we were there with him and nothing else mattered. It was a happening!

I’ll never forget when he sang a slow-bluesy overtly sexy version of Little Red Corvette. I actually thought I was going to faint. I was overcome with feelings and felt like every word he sang was running through my body. 🙂

Prince was and is a complicated, fascinating, erotic :), hilarious  and sometimes frustrating artist to admire. There are no words I can use to explain how I feel about him. I always used to joke that “He is everything you want in a man and a woman all wrapped up into a tiny package.” Now that feels like a silly thing to say.

He didn’t just play music. He WAS music. And his music flowed into my ears and lyrics rattled around in my brain and the joy of his creation came out through my body and made me want to dance.

image1I was so lucky that I got to see him play in Toronto and then a month later he came to Victoria and I got to see him again with my friend Kimmee. We even got tickets to the Afterparty and I was able to witness Prince playing to a very small crowd of people at Sugar nightclub. I think there was maybe 200 people there? It was incredible. I went to bed at 5am that night!!!

He had just started his Piano & a Microphone tour. It was just him and a piano on stage and I knew it was going to be special.

I was really looking forward to him announcing a show somewhere near me. This tour he was announcing in a Hit & Run style. He’d announce the show date only a few days prior so I was VERY stressed out trying to stay on track of what city he was going to announce next. I was hoping for here or Vancouver …

When he announced Toronto I actually thought about getting a ticket and hopping on a plane the next day but then talked myself out of it. That’s crazy. Who does that?? I’ll wait till he announces a date somewhere near me … Wow. If I only knew.

During my chemotherapy treatment I didn’t listen to any music because I didn’t want to associate my favourite songs with treatment. I didn’t want those songs to connect in any way … but I must confess that every time I drove up to the cancer center for an appointment I would blast “BABY I’M A STAR” to get me pumped up for what was about to happen to me. It was fuel … It made me stronger.

Some people tell me they don’t “get” Prince and that’s ok. I do – get him – and that’s all that matters. This relationship I’ve had with him for the last 30 years will continue until I take my last breath. I’m so grateful he left behind such an immense legacy for us to ponder.

I noticed in the media that when he first passed away it was all about his music and then slowly over the course of 24 hours the media started to talk about gossip and conjecture like it was fact. It’s disgusting to throw gossip like that out into the ether … but while they are “busy doing something close to nothing” – I’m ignoring anything sensational and just focusing on the joy of his music.

This is one of my favourite Purple Yoda television performance. It perfectly captures what was so special about him. Click the link and watch it before it’s taken down!! 💔☔️

This one is another favourite of mine … for obvious reasons.  🙂

“We could all die any day – but before I let that happen, I’ll dance my life away…”

 

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