My parents came to visit me last weekend to take me out to dinner for my birthday. Hooray!!
BTW. My birthday is in June but during that time I was so sick from the chemo that going out for food wasn’t something I could do so we postponed it until I had more of an appetite/energy.
They took me to Ulla. It’s not a veggie place but like most good restaurants in this city they have something vegetarian that can be veganized.
Gerry and I both had the only veggie dish on the menu. This is how they describe it: falafel, ancient grains, fermented turnips, vegetables, cashew cheese, yogurt.
We obviously had it without the yogurt and it was really good. The cashew cheese was tart and was excellent juxtaposed against the smokey grains. I quite enjoyed our meal. Dessert was a scoop of Grape Sorbet. It was delish!
We ended up sitting at the restaurant for almost 3 hours just gabbing about life, family and food. It was a great dinner … I love my parents. Especially when they get a glass of wine into them. Denise (my step mum) asked me if I was going to write another book. Maybe one about what I’m experiencing now? Or something different… I told her I wasn’t thinking that far ahead.
Plus I’m too exhausted to be creative right now. I can barely read 2 pages of a book without having to go back to read them again. My brain is NOT working …
We explained to them that Gerry and I decided to compartmentalize my cancer treatment. That way it’s not so overwhelming. First we got through the surgery. Then we broke my chemotherapy treatment into three parts. Red Devil Chemo, Taxol, and lastly radiation. Not thinking too far ahead helps me not stress out about all the things I need to suffer through. Right now I’m in my Taxol phase. I’m not even thinking about the radiation… or about what future projects look like.
I have a meeting with a genetic councilor in Mid-October to talk about doing testing to see if I have the breast cancer gene. If I test positive then we have to decide if I go with another mastectomy and also remove my ovaries.
If I test negative and get an all-clear then I have to decide if I’m going to do reconstructive surgery … It’s a lot to think about … So right now we focus on today and being happy with the fact that I can eat a meal and not get sick.
The next day we met my parents for brunch at Mo:Le. I had what I always have: The avocado crispy dulse sprout sandwich with almond mayonnaise. One day I’m going to try something else but I love that sandwich!! LOVE IT!
That weekend I also got to see Courtney Love play at Rifflandia. We were given tickets by our friend Trish at Smoking Lily.
It was good to be out and at a show … but I’ve been such a hermit that it’s weird to go from the quiet of my house to a fully packed music festival. It was a little overwhelming. ha ha.
Courtney was great but I wish she didn’t smoke. If you’re a singer and you smoke – you eventually lose all your range. She used to have a great guttural scream. Now it’s all dry burned out throat. Bummed me out. Smoking is bad kids. Don’t do it!
When the show started I realized I couldn’t see anything. I always forget how much I don’t like music festivals. I’m only 5 foot 1 inches tall – so music festivals are all armpits and farts for me. I can barely see the stage. It’s soooo not my scene but I’m really thankful I got to go and see her play (Thanks Trish).
That weekend I noticed how crazy exhausted Gerry has been … he works full time at Tattoo Zoo and then on his days off he takes me to chemo.
Since chemo isn’t as difficult as it was when I was doing the Red Devil I decided to give the poor guy a break. I e-mailed some of my closest peeps and asked if they could start to accompany me to chemo.
My dance card is so full …
The other night friend of mine sent me a lovely text that said “You have no idea how strong you are. How brave and with how much grace you are doing all this…”
It was so nice to hear that but it sure doesn’t feel like it from my end. I feel like I’m all flailing legs and arms but somehow I keep moving forward…That’s how Kramers do.
It feels like a baby chick or mouse hair. It’s soft and light. It’s VERY white … with a few dark hairs.
I was pepper and salt before. I wonder if I’ll be salt and pepa from now on? Where’s Spinderella in all this?